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So, I do intend to write about my experience as the Genre Fiction instructor for the Lambda Literary Retreat for Emerging LGBTQ Voices, which was amazing, and not just because of this delightful coffee mug:

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But now I want to tell you what I’m doing at Comic-Con!

I’m a Featured Guest, I’ll be at II-10 in Artist’s Alley  and I’m on two panels:

Historical Comics and Graphic Novels: Thursday, July 9th, 1 PM

Not all comics are about superheroes. In fact, there are some amazing graphic novels, comics and web comics that deal with events from history. Some are personal stories, some are historical accounts and some are the creator’s own take, but they all bring history alive. Creators Peter Bagge (Hate, Woman Rebel: The Margaret Sanger Story), Ed Piskor (Hip-Hop Family Tree), Matt Phelan (The Storm in the Barn), Sara Ryan (Escape From Alcatraz), and Lora Innes (The Dreamer), discuss their historical works with moderator Douglas Wolk (Reading Comics).

Normalizing Publishing: Sunday, July 12th, noon

Shonda Rhimes famously said that she’s not “‘diversifying’ TV, she’s normalizing it: “Making it look like the world looks.” Join Sara Ryan (Bad Houses, Lambda Literary Emerging LGBTQ Writers Retreat instructor), Nilah Magruder (M.F.K., Dwayne McDuffie Award for Diversity recipient), Nicola Yoon (Everything Everything, We Need Diverse Books team member), Cindy Pon (Serpentine, We Need Diverse Books advisory committee, Diversity in YA co-founder), and Greg van Eekhout (California Bones, The Boy at the End of the World) discuss how this normalizing is, and isn’t, happening and what we can all do to promote inclusive storytelling.

 

I’m looking forward to both of them, but I’m particularly excited about the second one. See, as a guest, I get a “spotlight panel”, which means that basically I can do whatever I want for fifty minutes.

I decided what I wanted was to share the stage with smart interesting people and talk about stuff that matters.

See you in San Diego!

 

 

Originally published at sararyan.com. You can comment here or there.

Why I Was Scared Shitless in June 1991

Journal excerpt, 1991:

I got into Clarion. It’s a highly intensive writing workshop for writers of sf and fantasy. 

Has me scared shitless.

Five Reasons I Was Scared Shitless (An Incomplete List)

1. Even though it was only an hour away from where I lived, it would be the longest I’d been away from home. I didn’t know how my absence would affect my relationships.

2. I didn’t know any of the other students. What if they didn’t like me?

3. I didn’t know what the instructors would expect. What if they didn’t like me?

4. I desperately, desperately wanted to be a writer. What if they didn’t think I could be a writer? What would happen to my identity?

5. And speaking of my identity: I’d only recently begun to understand that I was queer. How would others react if I came out? Should I come out? How would I feel if I didn’t? How would I feel if I did?

…I wanted to remind myself what it was like to be just about to be a student at an intensive writing workshop, because now I’m just about to be an instructor at one: the Genre workshop at the Lambda Literary Retreat for Emerging LGBTQ Voices.

Here are a few excerpts from the notes I took in 1991. (Yes, I still have the notebook.)

From a Tim Powers talk:

Writing is WORK and CONSTRUCTION don"t confuse MOTION and MOVEMENT with action.

writing is WORK and CONSTRUCTION don’t confuse MOTION and MOVEMENT with action

What another student wanted to see in one of my stories:

more mayhem!! ever-increasing mayhem!!

more mayhem!! ever-increasing mayhem!!

From an Ellen Kushner talk:

SENSUALITY I CAN USE THIS -- especially pain, strong emotion, petty emotion

SENSUALITY: I CAN USE THIS — especially pain, strong emotion, petty emotion…

Note to myself with an idea for a story I did not end up writing for reasons that may rapidly become apparent:

story, what happens to your brain when you"re fatigued

story, what happens to your brain when you’re fatigued

A reality check from Karen Joy Fowler:

Karen says: no agent til novel LEARN TO LIVE WITHOUT REASSURANCE

Karen says: no agent til novel LEARN TO LIVE WITHOUT REASSURANCE

And another one from Kate Wilhelm and Damon Knight. I think I can call myself a case in point:

SURVIVAL OF THE PERSISTENT

SURVIVAL OF THE PERSISTENT

 

 

Originally published at sararyan.com. You can comment here or there.

Status update.

When you’re dealing with difficult things but they’re the same difficult things you’ve been dealing with for years, and you sort of want to talk about them but you’re also tired of hearing yourself talk about them, and you send a few messages, start and delete several others, and go to a movie alone and step out afterwards into a big Midwestern parking lot and the moment before the distraction provided by the film dissipates, you hold your phone up to the sky.

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Originally published at sararyan.com. You can comment here or there.

Gone Home: what I loved and what I learned

I’m a compulsive reader. I’m less consistently engaged by movies and television, but there are certainly any number of films and shows I love.  Over the past several years, though, I’ve become increasingly aware that there’s an entire type of narrative with which I haven’t been able to connect.

I glean things from time to time — for instance I understand, vaguely, that many folks in my social circle play, love, critique, passionately discuss, create fan art for, and are otherwise engaged with games like Bioshock, Mass Effect, and Dragon Age.

But by and large, I’ve never found games fun.

Back in the dark ages, my fervent enjoyment of Ms. Pac-Man (as much for its name as for the gameplay) always coexisted with anxiety and frustration (whether due to inadequate hand-eye coordination or lack of quarters).

More recently, playing games, like reading some mainstream comics, has seemed more like work than entertainment, requiring Talmudic-level knowledge of creators, techniques and game mechanics. Or I’ve thought playing games would be like middle school gym class, where I knew I’d struggle with activities that others found simple, intuitive, enjoyable.

Turns out I hadn’t found the right game.

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I wouldn’t have found it, either, if it hadn’t been for Carmen Maria Machado‘s thoughtful appreciation in the L.A. Review of Books, “Why Alice Munro Should Play ‘Gone Home‘: The Video Game As Story And Experience.” I bought Gone Home immediately after reading Machado’s piece, and played Gone Home, with only a few pauses, for the next several hours.

Anyone with more of a connection to the world of indie games than I have is, no doubt, not surprised. The game has been out since 2013. It’s won a lot of awards.

And anyone who knows me IRL will also not be surprised that the game with which I connected so strongly:

  • is set in the Pacific Northwest
  •  involves exploring a big weird house and a family’s left-behind possessions & ephemera
  • includes multiple characters’ writing in various genres (postcards, letters, passed notes, genre fiction, zines) and
  • (spoiler alert) involves a queer girl romance.

I mean.

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But even more than my delight in all the elements that felt tailor-made to delight me, what I appreciate most about Gone Home is how it subverts ideas about what even constitutes a story.

Received ideas about narrative are hard to escape. Conflict is everything. Raise the stakes. What does your protagonist want? What’s in the way of her getting it? What’s the through-line? What’s her arc? Who’s the Big Bad? Make it hurt!

Gone Home’s storytelling doesn’t work like that. You extrapolate from fragments. Relationships reveal themselves to you gradually. You discover that the Greenbriar family home, the “Psycho House,” both is and is not what it seems. And if an antagonist even exists, it’s, perhaps, simply the emotional and physical distance between the characters.

The Alice Munro quote about stories considered as houses that Machado includes in her piece about Gone Home is certainly apt (go read it if you haven’t already). I thought of another, a favorite passage from Ursula Le Guin’s essay “The Carrier Bag Theory of Fiction”:

So, when I came to writing science-fiction novels, I came lugging this great heavy bag of stuff, my carrier bag full of wimps and klutzes, and tiny grains of things smaller than a mustard seed, and intricately woven nets which when laboriously unknotted are seen to contain one blue pebble, an imperturbably functioning chronometer telling the time on another world, and a mouse’s skull; full of beginnings without ends, of initiations, of losses, of transformations and translations, and far more tricks than conflicts, far fewer triumphs than snares and delusions; full of space ships that get stuck, missions that fail, and people who don’t understand.

There are a lot of stories inside the carrier bag of Gone Home’s house. And like Le Guin’s essay, they remind me that the ‘narrative trajectory’ is only one way to think about what stories are, or can be.

Originally published at sararyan.com. You can comment here or there.

back from Emerald City

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I am incapable of taking the train without also taking photos out the window while it’s in motion.

Emerald City was terrific as usual. Highlights this year, aside from lovely interactions across the table, included the excellent meetup organized by Marissa Louise, various smaller-scale gatherings with old and new friends, and that curious con phenomenon where you manage to catch up with folks who live in the same city as you, yet whom you somehow never see while you’re at home.

Originally published at sararyan.com. You can comment here or there.

PDX Cocoon

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Is there anything more relevant to the interests of a YA author than an evening of hearing teenagers tell stories about risk?

PDX Cocoon: stories by Portland youth is brand new; last night was the first performance. Lead producer Nico Hamacher set the tone by warning the audience that there would be ‘profanity and questionable decisionmaking’ in the stories; that got a big laugh, and was an entirely accurate description.

What I appreciated most was the range of risks represented in the stories: from moving to a new country alone to sneaking out at night with friends, from near-death experiences to going in for a first kiss.

Definitely looking forward to future PDX Cocoon events.

 

Originally published at sararyan.com. You can comment here or there.

Four things for February

1. Saw a friend recently, and he asked, “What’ve you been up to?” I paused, shrugged, and we both started laughing. He’s a writer too; we agreed that when you’re not necessarily wanting to talk in great detail about what you’re working on, you’re also not necessarily gonna be an outstanding conversationalist, because what you’re up to, basically, is writing.

2. But I’m also always reading and listening. I discovered the Nerdette podcast after seeing Tricia Bobeda on an excellent panel at ALA Midwinter and particularly enjoyed the recent episode featuring Scott McCloud.

3. In online reading, I’m very much appreciating Malinda Lo’s Perceptions of Diversity in Book Reviewing series; here’s Part 1: “Scarcely Plausible,” and Part 2: “So Many (Too Many?) Issues.”

4. I mentioned this elsewhere online but buried the lede, so let me try again: here is a picture of me at about age seven, dressed in a Wonder Woman costume that was homemade except for the mask.

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The boots are rain boots, the gloves are dishwashing gloves, the belt buckle is made from a coffee can lid. I post this not just to demonstrate my mom’s cleverness at constructing this early cosplay, but as a way to announce that I wrote a story for Sensation Comics: Featuring Wonder WomanIt’s not out yet, but assuredly I’ll post about it again when it is. Christian Duce is doing the art. And I wish I could go back and tell my 90s Sandman-reading self that one day I’d have a story in a comic with a cover by Michael Zulli.

 

Originally published at sararyan.com. You can comment here or there.

2014 in review, 2015 in prospect

I used two tools to come up with a basic overview of what-I-did-in-2014: my calendar, and the bookkeeping program I use to track my freelance work. A bit reductionist, but they do serve to more or less document what I was up to.

Four university events in 2014:

photo credit: Darice Cobb

Kapow! at Eastern Michigan University, a comics art exhibit and panel discussion; also a chance to see old friends who braved the ghastly weather.

 

 

 

photo credit Emma Fierberg

Syracuse University’s student-organized Life Gets Better Together conference, where I was on the keynote panel about the cultural climate for LGBT folks and taught a writing workshop.

 

 

University of Michigan’s Kids Read Comics in the Classroom preconference, another panel! And another opportunity to see old friends, better weather this time.

At Western Oregon University, all by myself this time, talking about Bad Houses with Shaun Huston’s Cultural Geography class. Favorite student response: “Today Sara Ryan came in and she seems pretty kick ass … She has an awesome vibe and spoke about the process of making Bad Houses with great enthusiasm.”

I was a guest at three comic conventions: Emerald City, Wondercon, and the Rose City Comicon.

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I was on yet another panel at YALSA’s Young Adult Literature Symposium, this one on YA Realness: what makes ‘contemporary YA’ feel true to readers? Also participated in the very exciting Book Blitz, where the above photo was taken.

And I taught a couple of workshops, one on comics writing, one with Rosanne Parry on writing with cultural responsiveness, at the Society of Children’s Book Writers & Illustrators Oregon conference. Also a writing workshop at the Ann Arbor District Library, and four comics writing workshops for teens at Columbus Metropolitan Library.

Whew.

…but wait, did you actually write anything? 

Yes I did: a more-than-usually-self-disclosing essay for an anthology, and a short comic featuring an extremely well-known character for another anthology. Neither has yet appeared but I will tell you when they do. And also other things, which are In Progress.

In 2015, so far I’m most looking forward to teaching at the Lambda Literary Foundation Retreat for Emerging LGBT Voices, being a special guest at the San Diego Comic-Con, and — needless to say — progressing on the things that are In Progress. Further bulletins as events warrant.

Originally published at sararyan.com. You can comment here or there.

Books I received as gifts.

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Books have always been my favorite items to give and receive. This holiday friends & family presented me with the following:

  • Evasiondescribed by The Insurgent as “many beautiful stories about surviving in voluntary squalor that are human and touching, yet liberatory and hopeful at the same time.”
  • London Under: the secret history beneath the streetsI’ve enjoyed the other Peter Ackroyd books I’ve read, especially his Shakespeare biography, and anything with a subtitle that includes the phrase ‘secret history’ is likely to pull me in.
  • Americanahwhich I’ve previously read as an audiobook and am happy to have on paper to reread.
  • The Woman Who Borrowed Memories: selected stories. Tove Jansson is one of my all-time favorite authors and I’m ridiculously excited about reading new-to-me stories from her.
  • HavI’ve read other travel books by Jan Morris but had no idea this one existed; a travel book about a place she invented, with an introduction by Ursula K. LeGuin. Sold!
  • The Urban Circus: travels with Mexico’s malabaristas. I have a longstanding interest in circus, and this paragraph from the first chapter is immediately intriguing: “Malabarista. Most dictionaries will tell you it means ‘juggler’, but it’s broader than that. It describes a specific type of circus performer: one whose skill lies in the manipulation of objects. And beneath that it carries a note of ambiguity, a hint at something darker. I have heard that in Chile, it can also mean ‘trickster': one whose skill lies in the manipulation of people.”
  • Godtalk: travels in spiritual AmericaI’m also fascinated by the role religion & spirituality play in people’s lives, so I’m looking forward to this overview of several faiths by an author who took a participatory approach to his investigation.
  • Ilf and Petrov’s American Road Trip: the 1935 travelogue of two Soviet writers, Ilya Ilf and Eugeny PetrovAlmost done with this one already; wry observations and interesting photos.

If I don’t post again before 2015, the above should explain why.

Originally published at sararyan.com. You can comment here or there.

Sighted: stickers in SE Portland

If you follow me on Twitter, you know I often post photos captioned only with the word “Sighted.”

I thought about posting these that way, but I think they have greater impact when viewed as a group. They were all posted on a wooden security fence around one of the many buildings under construction in the neighborhood, close-in southeast Portland, on Division Street.

There were more stickers than I photographed, but we were on our way to (Re)Writing The Future: Social Justice and Science Fiction, and thought, correctly, that there’d be a packed house.

I’d love to properly credit the origin/creators of the stickers; if anyone who sees this knows the story, let me know.

stickers reading "Hello I wish I could:" escape debt, have collective resources, feel safe, get three meals a day stickers reading "Hello I wish I could:" retain long term residents, change city policies, get affordable groceries without getting on a bus, protect my children from being shot Stickers reading "Hello I wish I could:" respected by WHITES, afford to live in my own neighborhood, not be profiled when I walk into a store, trust my neighbors

(Stickers are all the same design; they look like the traditional “HELLO my name is” style, but instead say “HELLO I wish I could…” People have filled them out expressing the following wishes: escape debt, have collective resources, feel safe, eat three meals a day, retain long term residents, change city policies, get affordable groceries without getting on a bus, protect my children from being shot, respected by whites, afford to live in my own neighborhood, not be profiled when I walk in a store, trust my neighbors.)

 

Originally published at sararyan.com. You can comment here or there.